


Filling in the Blanks with the Wrong Answers

by gwennyber



Category: PangPang Pancakes
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:49:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29854209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gwennyber/pseuds/gwennyber
Summary: (DISCLAIMER MUNA: This is a work of fiction. The title of the story refers to my (our?) tendency to make wild inferences when it comes to PangPang's interactions. Tread with care. Leave the "deluluing" within this space.)
Relationships: Paolo Pangilinan/Ian Pangilinan





	Filling in the Blanks with the Wrong Answers

**Author's Note:**

> (DISCLAIMER MUNA: This is a work of fiction. The title of the story refers to my (our?) tendency to make wild inferences when it comes to PangPang's interactions. Tread with care. Leave the "deluluing" within this space.)

**IAN**

We are drawn to that which is familiar. Just repeatedly being around someone's presence increases the likelihood that we will be attracted to them, or that's what google said when Ian searched for the meaning of "Law of proximity".

Ian stared as Paolo gestured comically with his hands in an attempt to mimic his cat's shenanigans earlier that day. He had always been an animated storyteller and Ian used to envy how he could draw laughter out of people with his witty jokes and colorful stories until one day he found himself just as enraptured.

"Grabe! Ayaw niyáng bitawan sa pagkakakagát 'yung dagâ. Gustó ko na lang talagá maglupasay doón sa sahíg sa pandidiri. Kung nakita mo 'yung itsura nung dagâ nakaganitó siya o, eeuwek" Paolo squeaked, drew his arms closer to his chest, rolled his eyes upwards, lolled his tongue out, and tilted his head to the side in an exaggerated version of what the dead rat looked like.

And Ian smiled because the light from the table lamp behind Paolo created a soft halo around his figure.

 _He looks ethereal_ , he thought.

(Mga Payaso sa likód ng tabing: Natuluyan na pô siyá, opô.)

Paolo started laughing hysterically and Ian's smile grew wider until it settled into a foolish grin because he loved hearing how carefree the other boy's laughters can get.

Paolo's laugh would start from punctuated giggles which will be followed by an explosion of cackles until it eventually dies down to soft snickers that he would try to hide by biting his lips. Ian had memorized this.

Then, he felt himself falling backwards. He was waken from his fantasy when he realized that he had indeed fallen backwards into Paolo's bed. Apparently, he got pushed by the other boy who have a habit of flailing his hands whenever he's in the middle of a laughing fit.

"What?" Ian sat up with a start and blinked at Paolo.

"'Yung dagâ ngâ kasí," Paolo repeated.

"What dagâ?" Ian was confused. Had he spaced out again? he thought with alarm.

Ian has a habit of getting flustered, or dazed, or out of breath whenever he was with Paolo. He's just lucky that he's been good at hiding his feelings for far lesser mortals would have panicked when confronted by the same kind of feelings he have for the other boy, Ian thought.

(Mga Payaso sa likód ng tabing: What is delusional? Ian is delusional)

So, Ian tried to focus on Paolo who has stopped laughing and was looking at him curiously.

"Oh, the dagâ. I don't like rats" Ian nodded as he tried to appear confident because he was one of those foolish people who believed in the saying, 'Push mo te hanggáng sa maniwalà silá'

"Have you watched Rosamund Pike's new Netflix movie?"

"Meron?" Paolo sighed as Ian reached for his laptop.

"Napag-iiwanan na namán akó. Ang busy ko kasí with acads these days," he made a crying face.

Ian tried to suppress a silly smile because if there was one thing that he had mastered when it came to dealing with Paolo, it was how to successfully stir a conversation from one topic to another without the other noticing it.

Ang bilís kasí ma-distract. Jeje.

(Paolo's Angels: Proud ka nyern?)

"Let's watch it together" Ian patted the space beside him. He leaned back on the pillow that he propped against the headboard of Paolo's bed and placed another one right beside him for the older boy.

"D'yan ka lang at kukuha muna akó ng chips at softdrinks" Paolo ran out of the room before Ian could stop him.

"And milk tea!"

"And bread!"

"And chocolates!"

Ian could hear Paolo's shouts from outside the bedroom.

"Pao, 'wág masyadong maingay," came the voice of Paolo's mother.

Ian realized something and he got up from the bed and rushed to the living room where the woman was lounging on the couch, a cellphone in her hand.

"Tita, mag-oovernight pô ulit akó," Ian announced.

"Sure. Parang bahay mo na rin 'tó eh" she watched as a small smile appeared on Ian's lips.

"Hindî pa pô," came the shy reply.

"Hindî...pa?" The woman looked confused for a second before she laughed and mouthed, _I got you_.

(Keka: Si Ian, pailalim...)

"Anó pala ang gustó mong breakfast bukas?"

"Can I prepare the breakfast pô?"

She looked thoughtfully at the boy before her, "Okay pero hínay-hinay lang anák ha"

Ian replied a soft, "Yes" and bid the woman goodnight.

The moment between the two was brief and there were hardly any words exchanged but Ian knew that Paolo's mother understood him in a way that only mothers can.

 _You got this_ , Ian, he chanted to himself.

Upon entering the bedroom, Ian found that Paolo had already settled on his half of the bed and was distributing the snacks evenly on both sides.

"Grabe. It's not like I'm going to steal all those chips from you" Ian accused as he approached.

"Grabe. It's very likely that you'll steal from my share...again," Paolo pointed out.

"Oo na. Ang damot," Ian unceremoniously plopped himself on the bed causing for the snacks to scatter all over the place much to Paolo's horror who grabbed his favorites from the pile in case the other beats him to it.

An hour and a half later just as Pike's character, Marla, struggled to get out of a sinking car, Ian noticed a gentle snuffling beside him. Snuggled on his side, face pasted on Ian's left arm was Paolo asleep and wiggling himself closer to the warmth of the younger one's body.

(Mga Payaso sa likód ng tabing: SHUTA.)

Ian had heard people jokingly warn Paolo to be careful of his heart lest he falls in love with Ian but Ian knew better. He knew it the moment Paolo jokingly captured his face when he couldn't look him in the eye during one of their first "acting workshops".

Ian could hardly believe how he braved through those early days when every touch brought prickles of electricity, when every longing gaze was a possibility of something more, and when every story felt like a gift of self.

(Keka: Ay pota ka. Sabi mo ibá lang talagá ang init na dalá ng global warming kayâ sobra ka kung pagpawisan. Nagsakripisyo kamí ni Pao para lang itutok ng buô sa'yo 'yung electric fan!)

(Mga Payaso sa likód ng tabing: Ilapág ang video)

(Nag-íisáng Payaso-in-denial: Nagtipid sa aircon. Walâng budget)

But back then, those premature feelings of attraction felt impossible because from the very beginning Paolo had stated, declared, reiterated, and shouted to the world of his single-minded goal to become a doctor, romance be damned.

And so, Ian learned to adjust. He succumbed to every touch as if he wasn't burning inside, he held every gaze as if he wasn't feeling hypnotized by those impossibly long eyelashes, and he listened to every story as if he wasn't a bit annoyed that he couldn't take a larger role in the narrative of Paolo's life.

(Chorus: Ian babie🥺)

(Nag-íisáng Payaso-in-denial: PangPang lubóg pa rin kasí unrequited)

(Keka: Blocked☝️)

The figure beside him shifted a little and an arm snaked over Ian's stomach to embrace him. Ian exhaled as he settled a hand over the other's.

 _Just repeatedly being around someone's presence increases the likelihood that we will be attracted to them_ , Ian repeated to himself.

"Pao, it's been a year. Walâ pa rin ba?" he whispered.


End file.
